


For Instance

by zombz_comz



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Angst and Tragedy, Death, For once shuichi isn’t horny, Hurt No Comfort, M/M, im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-07
Updated: 2020-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-01 02:15:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23057590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zombz_comz/pseuds/zombz_comz
Summary: Heavily based on For Instance by Shane Koyczan (scenes were taken from his story but not put in chronological order as told)
Relationships: Momota Kaito/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 1
Kudos: 17





	For Instance

Take for instance the first time Shuichi met Kaito Momota. He would have to remember back to the first year at school. He had seen him walking in the rain with no umbrella or coat, so he went to ask if he wanted a spare that Shuichi had been carrying. And that’s when Shuichi heard the response of someone amazing. 

“This isn’t rain. It’s the weather pretending to be busy. I’ll be fine.” 

They had gone to a coffee shop and exchanged numbers. Kaito had ordered a warm lemon and honey tea while Shuichi sipped on a coffee, and they talked about what they liked. Shuichi told how he wanted to be a top class detective to solve the most mysterious cases. Kaito told how he wanted to be an astronaut, no fear in his voice as he went on about how he wanted to be the one to travel to new worlds and bring light to what they were like.

Before they left, Shuichi once again asked if he wanted to borrow an umbrella to get back to the dorms of the school. He only got a smile, swore he saw a sparkle in those violet eyes. 

“The inventor of the umbrella was a pussy.” 

It wasn’t until three days later that Shuichi had gotten a call from Kaito, who was sick, where he reconsidered his statement. Maybe the inventor was a little wiser than he thought.

From then, they would have different outings. There would be nights where they went through the town acting like millionaires, splurging on the stupidest things but doing it happily. They would go on outings to find an area without light pollution and look at the vast array of stars in the night skies, pointing out constellations and then making their own. 

Take for instance one of the times that Shuichi visited Kaito’s dorm, he questioned why there was a rock sitting on a dresser on a satin pillow. Kaito explained that it used to be a star. It only looked like a rock now because so many people wished on it and broke it down, because a little star can only handle so much. 

Take for instance how whenever Shuichi felt down, whenever he felt like he was going to explode with stress and expectation, Kaito would always be there. His loud voice would settle to whispers of reassurance, holding the small body close to him and letting him know it was going to be okay. That he was strong. And even though Kaito would usually say that men shouldn’t cry, he would reassure that Shuichi could do so if he needed. Because everyone has a breaking point. 

And Shuichi finally realized and let himself know the fact that he saw Kaito as something more than a friend. And he would tell him. He promised himself he would. And he wouldn’t back down when it came to that point. 

Take for instance how they eventually had to cut their meetings short, and at one point, Kaito had to leave. He was going to training so he could achieve his goal of going to space. Shuichi ran as fast as he could to catch Kaito at the station, getting there ten minutes before it was supposed to pull in. 

“Kaito!”

“Shuichi?” 

Kaito turned to him, setting his bags down and almost getting tackled with a hug. They chatted for a minute before Shuichi finally found his breath, and decided now was the time. 

“Kaito.. You can tell me off or tell me to go away if you want to.. but I like you. I really do. I love you. I know I shouldn’t have done this right before you left but-“

And that’s when he felt hands on his shoulders. And lips on his own. He slowly melted into the kiss, gripping on to Kaito’s jacket for dear life. 

It was when he pulled away that Kaito gave a final reassurance to Shuichi. The reassurance Shuichi wanted to hear. 

“I love you too.” 

They held hands and chatted, kissing occasionally on the bench. It was when the train pulled in that they knew they had to part. It was a long goodbye, and Shuichi swore that those violet eyes were tearing up, but he knew they’d talk. He knew that he’d see Kaito again.

Take for instance how Kaito took three hours out of every Sunday to video call Shuichi at night, so they could keep up and tell each other the events of life and the ‘I love you’s that they couldn’t say in person. And Kaito took a weekend every three months to visit his favorite person, to be able to hold him and kiss him and tell him how much he missed him. 

It was all that Shuichi needed, and as long as he knew that Kaito would be there, whether it be over video or in person.

Take for instance when it was time for Kaito to leave for space. He was trained and set to test out a new shuttle that would expand out to the moon’s edge, so they could monitor both areas. And Kaito would still find time every week to call Shuichi and let him know how everything was going, and the detective would listen closely as he explained and recounted every little discovery from the telescope implemented, how he could see the moon and its craters from a close distance. 

Now take for instance the word instantly. A word used to describe things like coffee and mashed potatoes. But the word was used to describe Kaito’s death. 

Shuichi found it sickening, how a word like ‘instantly’ described his boyfriend’s life. How it was apparently supposed to bring some sort of comfort that Kaito was dead. How he never got any last words or long goodbyes. 

There was a malfunction and no time to leave. No way to leave. Him and his few shuttle-mates had to wait out their untimely death, the ship going out in a large explosion that the world would never know or see if it wasn’t broadcasted. 

Shuichi knew that there were people who had life pumped in to them against their will who wanted to leave and Kaito wouldn’t have wanted that. But Kaito also wouldn’t have wanted death. 

Shuichi thought about Kaito’s life, how it was like a book. And where it ended he expected it to continue, just the end of a chapter with a cliffhanger. 

The funeral was quiet. Shuichi could barely mutter any words for his boyfriend, the only clear statement being an “I’m sorry”. His friends all gave their sympathies but he didn’t want it. He wanted Kaito back. 

He started letting life get to him again, but this time he had no arms to sink in to as a calm voice told him it was okay to cry. He could barely bring himself to go to Kaito’s bag that sat in his room, filled with items that he couldn’t take with him. When he finally found the courage to see what was inside, he found the rock. 

Take for instance how that rock brought a small comfort to Shuichi. He knew that it was like him, broken from too much being put on to it. He would cry out desperate questions of why, knowing there would be no answer to it. He would cry and call out, knowing there would be no response. He would believe that Kaito would walk though that door, knowing it would never happen. 

Take for instance the breaking point of a person.

Take for instance the rattle of a pill bottle opening.

Take for instance the thud of Shuichi’s body on the floor as he felt himself slowly lose life, but smiling as he faded out. 

It felt like he was in space. 

And he would see Kaito again. 

He would see his Luminary.


End file.
